InvestorQ : How to resolve money issues with my life partner?
Mahil Khan made post

How to resolve money issues with my life partner?

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Roshni Hegde answered.
1 year ago

It has been on a frequent note that a lot of families have disagreements over financial matters. Such arguments over money can prove toxic in any relationship. According to a survey, almost every fourth couple has frequent fights over money. Mainly the topics over partner's overspending or her frugality and other financial support to relatives. This causes disagreement between partner leading to disturbed social life.
However, it is not necessary that overspending can be a cause of the financial problem as far as it shows no impact on savings. One of the main cause of money quarrel between most of the couples is the lack of financial knowledge. Thus, couples prefer to avoid discussion on investment choices. Experts say, due to fear or having lesser knowledge some partner leave investments completely on their spouse. This also happens when the higher-earning partner assumes that investment decisions will be as per his/her planning. This pre-assumption should be avoided. Both the partners should mutually plan future goals and plan investment accordingly. In order to put this in order, there are few facts that generally happy couples believe in maintaining a healthy relationship;
They discuss money- Couples who set their time aside to talk about money and together set financial goal proves to be happy couples.
Maintaining joint bank account- Happy couple practice sharing expenses like common basic necessities, such as rent or mortgage payments. They maintain a joint bank account.
The separate bank accounts- Apart from maintaining joint bank account keeping bank account separate prove good for personal growth, personal responsibility.
Understanding each other’s money type- Happy couples understand their own money type and their partner’s.
Understanding each other’s love language- One should not try to change their partner's financial plan instead find a middle ground.
Building a secure money blanket- Building a good secure corpus together is also a sign of happy couples. A money blanket means a shield covered against a financial target or sudden need.
Keeping money as a mean, not an end- To be happy partners must know that money won’t give them fulfillment and purpose. Money must be utilized to travel and experience the world and to support continued learning and a healthy lifestyle.
Setting aside money for leisure and fun- Targeting financial goal together doesn't mean shunning fun or material goods. In the whole process, happy couples never deprive themselves in spending money.
Maintaining necessary balance- Over every expense and investment, a happy couple believes in maintaining fixed bank balance.

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1 year ago

I am assuming by partner you are referring to your life partner since you tagged it as Personal Finance.

Firstly, ensure your partner has their own bank account by means of which they have a sense of financial independence. They many be employed or home makers; in either case, you can ensure they have the the liberty to lead a lifestyle as you do. If you spend 5,000 a month on yourself (Shopping, Personal upkeep, Entertainment etc), it is fair to have the same transferred into their account for personal expenses. Don't worry too much if the money is spent or not; may be its your own birthday gift coming from it someday.

It is also advisable to have a Joint Account where both can contribute to address joint expenses incurred (Grocery, maid, rent etc). Set a monthly budget and keep a track if its is going as per the expectations. If anyone is spending from their personal account for such expenses, its fair to adjust it accordingly. This will help keep expenses in check for the overall household. Savings can definitely be used for higher value purchases, joint investments or for a holiday together.

It is also fair to nominate each other in investments so that it can be "our investments" in the real sense.

Lastly, be transparent in terms of financial expectations and practical in terms of spending.